What nobody tells you about having nails

 

Let's ignore my lack of painting skills and focus on the length...
Let’s ignore my lack of painting skills and focus on the length…

As those of you who know me in real life will be aware, one of my worst habits is biting my nails. Or at least it was. You see, an unexpected side effect of having my wisdom teeth out was that, after three weeks of being unable to bite or chew properly, I suddenly had nails that were actually deserving of being labelled such (and worth putting nail varnish on). And I’m determined to keep them that way! But since then, I’ve discovered a number of things that none of the people who scolded me for biting my nails ever thought to mention…

  1. They catch on things! Tights, scarves, handbag straps… you name it, my nails will find a way to get caught on it!
  2. This is sort of related to the first one but… nails like to scratch! I managed to scratch my neck the other day while putting a scarf around it, and I have scratches on my legs, too. You’d think I’d been in a fight with a cat!
  3. Things get stuck behind them. Want to bake biscuits? Be prepared for dough behind your nails! That packet of crisps? Will leave half its flavouring behind your nails. Am I the only one that finds this incredibly annoying?
  4. When they get bent back, it hurts!! I actually knew this already because for a few years I’ve managed to keep the little nail on my left hand fairly long while the others either got bitten or broken off. But nobody bothers telling you that, do they?
  5. If you’re right handed, cutting the nails on your right hand is an exercise in frustration! I’m almost afraid to even cut those nails now in case I completely ruin them. How do other people with long nails do it? (I also can’t paint the nails on my right hand to save my life… my left hand is basically useless, so this particular problem may well be all my own).
  6. They get in the way. I try to pick something up (like a pencil) and my nails get there first. Typing leads to nails hitting the keyboard. Opening packaging? Nails prevent me from getting a proper grip! But the place that they get in the way the most is the kitchen… especially when I’m chopping. One of these days we’re going to be eating chicken risotto with added nail clippings. Mmmm, tasty! I’m hoping this is something that I’ll get used to and figure out a way round…

On the bright side, at least I don’t have to be ashamed to show my hands on photographs any more πŸ˜‰

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11 thoughts on “What nobody tells you about having nails

  1. Ooh I love this! I am a nail biter too, always have been, and every now and again i go through a moment where i don’t bite them. But I always invariably end up munching them off again. I don’t like it when they’re too long for many of same things you said, especially the bending back and catching of them, ouch!

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