I am terrible at being on my own. Absolutley terrible.
For a start there’s the whole making meals just for me thing. I walk into the kitchen, examine the food on the shelves, open the fridge, close it again and think about how long it takes to peel potatoes/slice carrots/chop an onions. Then my mind drifts to all the dishes that will have to be used to make a proper meal. Dishes that will then have to be washed up afterwards. By me. And I decide there’s no point in going to all that effort when nobody else is around to eat the food I prepare. And so, in the 5 days since Jan went away, I have been living on potato croquettes (just shove them in the oven and wait!), chocolate raisins, cake (not even home made cake I’m ashamed to say) and those Knorr instant thingies that claim to turn into pasta in cheese sauce or spaghetti bolognese as soon as you add boiling water.
Then there’s the sleeping thing. I’m used to sharing a bed with Jan. He’s here almost every night. When he’s not at mine I sometimes join him at his. On the nights that he’s at his place and I’m at mine I have trouble sleeping. The bed seems to magically grow… surely it hasn’t always been that big? The room feels colder, the flat emptier (actually that last one kind of makes sense. The flat is emptier…I’m the only person in it). But it’s okay, because usually it’s only for one night. When he goes away though, it’s not just for one night, but for a couple of days, a weekend, an entire week…
Which is why, since Wednesday, I haven’t made it to bed before midnight once. And even after getting into bed I’ve chosen reading until 1 or 2 am over going to sleep.
All that has to chnge now though. I start my new job tomorrow. That means getting up early enough to be showered, dressed, breakfasted and on the train that leaves Karlsruhe at 7:30 am. It also means eating a proper breakfast so I’m not starving by 9 o’clock. And it means preparing something proper to eat for my lunch.
I’m so excited. I can’t wait to be a real, employed member of society again!
After blogging just the other day about how unfair it is that all the shops are having their summer sales and I have no money to buy anything I now have to make a confession.
Today I broke down and went and bought myself something.
It’s all the fault of Tally Weijl (Pleeease don’t ask me how to pronounce that. I have no idea. My German colleagues have no idea. The shop is Swiss, their language is weird.) Like all the other shops, Tally Weijl are currently having an end-of-summer sale, a fact that I only noticed today. As far as I’m concerend Tally Weijl sales are just plain amazing. The normal prices of their clothes are ridiculous. 19 euros for a T-shirt! Who in their right mine would pay that? But their sales are another story. I’ve seen clothes in Tally Weijl for 5 euros that started off being 30. Last year I bought a skirt from there that had originally been 20 euros. It’s long. It’s blue. It has bits gold bands around it with coloured embroidery and sequins and beads. I call it my gypsy skirt, because that’s what it reminds me of. My description probably makes it sound terrible, like a lurid whirl of colours all mashed together. But it’s really, really not. It’s beautiful. It may actually be my favourite item of clothing. And I found it in Tally Wijl last year reduced to 5 euros. I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. Then I took it to the counter and was told it had been reduced again… to 3 euros. In English money that would be 2 euros and 10 cents. Just over 2 euros for a gorgeous skirt! See, Tally Weihl sales are amazing! So when I saw the sale signs all over their windows today I just had to go in.
Now not all of Tally Weijl’s clothes are amazing. Some are just plain weird. Others I suspect I might have liked when I was 15, but these days I’m slightly too old for them. But then they have the odd item like me amazing skirt thrown in their to make it worth my while going in. Today I bought a blue and white tie die vest top with adjustable straps and a plain reddish orange top with three quarter length sleeves that will be perfect for work. Both items cost 3 euros. I think I can justify spending six euros (a little over 4 pounds) on a present for myself. And if it means spending slightly less on food this month, so what. It’s worth it to feel as happy as I do now.
In other news, the contract for my new internship has arrived. I just have to sign it and send it back then I will officially have a new job.
Life is looking pretty good right now.