Back to reality with a bump

After 6 lovely days of wandering round Rome, having other people pay for stuff for me and not thinking about job hunting, the employment agency or my lack of income at all returning to the real world has been a bit of  a shock. Yesterday I kind of eased my way into it, spending most of the day catching up on people’s blogs,  sorting out photographs of Rome to put on Facebook and blogging about Roman sights. I did check the employment agency website for new vacancies (of which there weren’t any… well, there was one for a German-Russian translator but that’s no good to me really). But today it was back to job hunting in earnest. Back to checking out every vacancies website I’ve ever heard of. Back to Googling every combination of the words “translator” “native speaker” “jobs” “employment” and “Karlsruhe” I could possibly think of. And back to wondering how on Earth people cope with being stuck in the house all day long with nothing to do and no money.

The good news is I had a phone call this morning from a woman inviting me to an interview next Thursday. The interview is with a personnel recruitment service, so not actually for the job itself as such… I suppose an interview with the company that’s actually offering the position will come at some later stage, but it’s a start. Even if I don’t actually know for sure what exactly the job even is – all the advert told me is that I will be coming into contact with customers (gulp!) and need to speak English, enjoy languages and know how to use a PC. Oh, and I should bring with me “unlimited willingness to learn”. Umm, ok then…

Is it bedtime yet?

This day seems to have gone on forever, and unfortunately it’s still far from being over.
Soo… on the advice of my boyfriend I went into work this morning and told my boss I wanted to take the job he offered me but still go to Stuttgart for the interview. He said he was busy then, but we would need to talk anyway and he would come and get me. About half an hour later I went back to his office and thus followed the longest 20 minutes of my life.
I won’t bore you with details, but basically the outcome was that if I couldn’t persuade him then and there that I want to stay in my current job his offer would be withdrawn. So it seems I’m taking his offer and not going to the interview on Thursday. I’ve just written the woamn from the Stuttgart company an email and feel horribly guilty for messing her around.  But I just couldn’t risk taking Thursday afternoon off for the interview, having the boss telling me that by going I’d blown my chance and then the Stuttgart people not wanting me either. I would probably have ended up taking my current job anyway, but it would have been nice to at least feel it was my choice. Hmm, ah well. As Jan pointed out my contract is only for one year (for now). It’ll be over soon enough and if I discover I really don’t like this job there’ll be plenty of time to look around for a new one then. Still all a bit weird and awkward though. Ick.

I am also bloody tired as a result of sleeping badly last night. I kept dreaming about spreadsheets (thanks to a horrible proofread I had to do yesterday that was in Excel) and waking up roughly every hour. Ugh! All I want to do is curl up in bed with Eeyore in my arms (since the boyfriend isn’t here tonight) but instead I have to go to a Heimvollversammlung (full house meeting) in my building. There are two per semester and we get to decide on things to do with the residence, for example at one we decided on whether to buy a new photocopier and at another the decision to have a roof terace built was made. None of the decisions are really relevant to me this time since I’ll probably have moved out by the time anything happens anyway, but everone in the building has to go – unless they hand in a written excuse beforehand. Those who don’t how up without a good reason are fined 15 euros. So guess where I’ll be tonight. Ooh the excitement is killing me! The meeting starts in half an hour so I’ll be off now. Need to email the photographs I took of my contract to the boyfriend so he can give it a read through for me. Oh to have a scanner!

Good stuff and guilt

I kind of had to tell my boss about the job interview today. He called me into his office to ask if I’d made my decision yet and when I said no he wanted to know why.Aarggh! I had no idea what to say! So I just told the truth. Then he was asking me what was so good about the other offer, or so bad about his. Then he said if they can’t be sure I’m going to take the job he can always advertise for someone else, becuase for him it doesn’t sound good. Oh man. Now I have a date for the interview – Thursday at 3:30pm – so tomorrow I have to go into work and ask for Thursday afternoon off. And whether I say it or not he’s going to know why. Eeep! Since I was already being honest when he asked me where the company is I figured there was no point in lying about that, so I told him. Stuttgart. To which he asked me if I really want to commute to Stuttgart every day. Well, that is one of the major factors against taking that job (if I’m even offered it!) The other one being that it will most likely pay less than he’s offering me. But it’s just translation, no project management. Although I think getting more project management probably isn’t a bad thing. And I can’t exactly run away and find a new job every time my work involves something I’m not that good at.
Anyway, so now I feel… I don’t know. Slightly guilty I guess. I mean, he’s offering me this great opportunity and I’m putting off answering because I’m considering taking something not as good, which I haven’t even been offered yet and may not even be offered. It’s almost like saying his company isn’t good enough for me or something. But apart from that work was actually pretty good today. I guess now they’ve told me they want me to stay I’m less worried that I might be doing something wrong. So that would be a point in favour of staying I suppose. Ugh, I hate making decisions. Even about good stuff.

Ooh, I also have other news!
Long time readers will be aware that I live in a student residence that I would really quite like to get out of, and in fact have to get out of by the end of March having told the people in charge that I would like to move out after this semester. Well, on 31st January I’m off to look at a flat! It’s not much – just a one room thing. But it would be a place of my own. And it at least has a separate kitchen, which a lot of the one room places don’t. And the rent is pretty cheap. I’m not getting my hopes up too much yet though. After all, I haven’t even seen it yet so it could be horrible, and also I’m probably not the only person that’s enquired about it. But it’s a start, and combined with the job thing makes me think things may be looking up in my life. Now I just hope it continues…

Decisions, decisions

Okay people, I have a dilemma on my hands. I have to make a decision. Not something I’m good at in the slightest…
You see, today I was offered a proper job at the place I work. The contract would be for one year, following which I would be offered an ope-ended contratc, provided I still want to stay. All sounds very good, yes. Then I arrived home to find an email from the company I applied for a position of trainee translator at before Christmas. Guess what? They want me to come for an interview. So, what do I do? I have decided I will at least go to the interview at the new place, but that means taking a day off work. Do I tell the boss where I’m going? Even though he’s made me a definite job offer? And if I’m then offered the other job what do I do, where do I go? Aargh… it’s making my head hurt already and I haven’t even had the interview yet!
It’s a good kind of dilemma though. Really I shouldn’t be complaining. Still a dilemma though, so if anyone has any advice please feel free to give me it…

Back to reality

I really need to stop eating the sweets I got for Christmas. I had so much chocolate yesterday I’m surprised I wasn’t sick. I also had fruit pastilles, crisps and a twix. I am officially a pig. Maybe I should have put something about getting fit on the list of resolutions, cos at this rate I’m serious danger of becoming as big as a beached whale. Hmmm.

Anyway, I go back to work tomorrow. This shouldn’t really come as a shock to me. It has been pretty much inevitable since the day I finished for Christmas. I think my subconcious must have been shielding me from it or something. Then last night the barrier broke and I lay awake for hours dreading it, despite the fact that I still have today to mentally prepare myself.
In case you hadn’t guessed by now I don’t actually want to go back. I’m afraid that I’m going to have forgotten how to do everything, that I’ll make the same mistakes as last year. I know I should think positive, and I have been trying but the little man inside me head keeps screaming things like “remember when they told you you have no social competence” and “what are you going to do when you run out of work then? You never did figure that one out, did you?”. Ugh, shut up little man! Also, my internship is due to end on 31st January. That’s 18 working days (I just counted on the calendar). Right now I’m still torn between praying they offer me a real job after that so that I know I have a job to go to and hoping they don’t want me to stay because I’m not sure I’d be able to cope with working there for another year or two.  Obviously if they do offer me a job I get to decide whether to take it or not, but I’m not sure I have much choice really. I have to work somewhere and it’s not like I’m drowning in job offers.

Oh well, there’s no point in worrying about it now. My first assessed piece for uni is due in soon and I haven’t even started it yet.
Oh yes, and, for the second day in a row, it’s snowing! It almost never snows in Karlsruhe! Must get out there later and take some photos…

More good news

It seems to be a week of good news on the jobs front. This morning somebody from Gernsbach called me. Apparantly she sent me something by post but it arrived back on her desk this morning with a stamp saying I don’t exist at that address. Very strange. I can assure you I do exist at my address – and she did have it right. She even read it out to me. Apparantly she had invited me to an interview tomorrow, but obviously I hadn’t got the letter, so we’ve rearranged it for next Thursday. It’s more than a week away and I’m nervous already! Wish me luck please.