Will this day ever end?

It’s currently ten o’clock at night. I’ve been up since 6 am, it’s been a long, stressful day at work, in which I didn’t even have time for a proper lunch break and all I want to do is go to bed and sleep… possibly until the end of the week. Unfortunately this is not possible. Tea is still in the oven refusing to do what it’s meant to do (stop being liquid mainly). On top of that, the kitchen is full of unwashed dishes from last night’s tea, which I am going to fail to wash once again, and I still haven’t taken out the food waste, despite the fact that I’ve been meaning to for about three days. My Grandma has just informed me that one of the stereotypes that Germans have about the British is that we’re messy… and she knows for a fact Jan thinks that about me. Thanks Grandma – at least now I know what you two talk about behind my back! And the worst of it is I can’t even deny it. After all, we all know I’m the world’s worst housewife (I’ve mentioned it often enough!). The best defense I could come up with was “he can talk”. Very original! I also managed to get on the wrong tram this morning, my train was delayed this evening and Jan is not home yet. This certainly hasn’t been what I would call one of the better days in my life. Here’s hoping tomorrow will be better… once I’ve had some sleep!

Shove it all on the top shelf and forget about it

The boyfriend returned from a weekend away with his choir yesterday. So last night we were talking about his flat and the fact that neither of us actually wants to spend any time there. “Maybe you would like it more if you were actually there occasionally,” I suggested. “Maybe,” he agreed, “and maybe I would also like being there more if I actually unpacked properly and tidied up a bit.” Then he added “But I’m not as bad as you”. How mean is that?! I asked him what he meant and he told me that he may not sort anything out or put it away, but at least he doesn’t leave everything on the floor. Such cheek! Firstly, I don’t leave everything on the floor (half of it is piled up on my desk!) and for secondly those things that are on the floor are there because I have nowhere else to put them! I lost my job 3 months after moving in here, and even when I was employed I wasn’t earning enough to furnish a whole flat all at once. So I still have no wardrobe, no bedside tables and nowhere to put roughly half of my kitchen stuff. But Jan was right about one thing… the flat was in a pretty bad state last night (refusing to do any housework whatsoever on my birthday combined with a weekend of baking stuff for parties then failing to put stuff away afterwards because I had to rush off to said parties had taken its toll on my flat). And on Saturday I am having people over for a belated birthday celebration-cum-flatwarming party thing. So today I have scrubbed and swept, rearranged and put away, tidied and organised… and it’s still not finished! But I did come up with a solution for my lack of furniture. In my entrance area/kitchen kind of thing (which is not actually a kitchen according to my contract) there is a cupboard. My clothes currently live in that cupboard, at the side furthest away from the kitchen. In the middle there is a space to hang stuff and at the other side is a cupboard without shelves where I keep my cleaning stuff. But all along the top there are smaller cupboards which, until now, I had only been using the bottom shelves of because I can’t reach any further than that. So today I climbed up on a chair and placed loads of the stuff that was residing on my bedroom floor – up against the walls I might add. Stacked neatly.  Not in the middle of the floor – Jan totally made me out to be worse than I am – are now on the top shelves of the cupboard. Yes, it’s just the adult equivalent of shoving everything under the bed and pulling down the sheets, and yes it probably means I will now forget about the stuff that’s up there and never be able to find it again. But at least my flat is going to look nice and tidy for my guests on Saturday!

Oh, and in the course of my tidying and sorting I actually tracked down all the recipes I had printed out or written down and put them into a ring binder. They’re not in any particular order or anything (I would like to organise them properly at some point) but they are in a folder, where I can actually find them when I want to cook something. And that means I can cross off number 80 on my list of 101 things. Yippee!

Mid-week moan

Today I:

– had the world’s quickest shower, because that’s the only kind you have time for when you stay in bed for an extra twenty minutes moaning softly to yourself every time the alarm goes off.

– realised as I was leaving the house that my purse wasn’t in my handbag and I had absolutely no idea where it was. This was followed by a couple of minutes of panic, until I found it in a carrier bag buried under the plates I bought yesterday.

– missed my tram because the stupid traffic lights refused to turn green and let me cross the road to the stop. I then walked to the next stop – not becasue I thought I could catch up with the tram (although I got there in time to see it pulling away – if I’d just gone straight to the other stop I would have caught it!) but to catch another tram to the train station, where I was able to change onto my own tram. Amazingly I still managed to get a seat.

– received an email at work regarding a text that I translated and my colleague proofread. Apparantly neither of us did a particularly good job – the text is still full of typos! Luckily the customer hasn’t actually complained (yet!), just asked me to explain what the words should be, but if she finds many more typos I may be in big trouble…

– Got home from work to find the strawberries in my fridge had gone mouldy and the Biomüll (food type rubbish) bin smelled so bad it literally made me want to puke (the world’s worst housewife strikes again…). Also, there was liquid floating around in the bottom of the bin. Never good in Biomüll. Then, once I’d emptied I realised I don’t have anything suitable for cleaning disgusting smelling bins, so it’s currently sitting in the sink full of hot water and washing up liquid. Cos that’s gonna do a tonne of good.

I think it’s about time this day came to an end now, don’t you?

The world’s worst housewife tidies up

On Monday the boyfriend is returning from LA. Actually, he gets back tomorrow but really, really late and by the time he’s in Karlsruhe again it will be the early hours of Monday morning, so he’s going straight home (to his place I mean) and I won’t get to see him until after work on Monday. That’s the day after tomorrow. In roughly 60 hours he will be standing in my living room. So I decided I’d better tidy up a bit. Unfortunately, as we all know, I am the world’s worst housewife. Thus my version of tidying up looks something like this:

– Take the bin bag for things that can be recycled out of the bin. Wander round the flat with it looking for other recycleable rubbish that I’ve left lying around at various times because the bin was just sooo far away. Put on some shoes and head down the stairs (3 whole flights!). Place rubbish bag in the big bin outside. Check mailbox on the way back upstairs only to discover it’s empty. Sulk.

– Arrive back upstairs. Decide I deserve a cup of tea before continuing with the housework. Boil water in a pan (I seriously need to get me a kettle!), pour water over teabag in cup. Remember that I forgot to buy milk yesterday.. and the day before, and the day before that. Check fridge. Disover that old milk is still in date (just!). Use it to make tea.

– Take cup of tea and the remains of random lemon cake into the living room (this is known as “breakfast”). Check e-mails, mess around on facebook, read blogs. Do all of this while eating. Drop cake crumbs all over myself, the floor and the chair I’m sitting on. Yay! More mess to clean up.

– Go to the kitchen. Start running hot water into the sink. Return to the internet while I wait for the water to run. Head back to the kitchen where I manage to wash 2 whole dishes before getting bored and returning to the internet. Repeat every 5 minutes until the dishes are finally done.

– Locate new bin bag for the recycleable waste bin. Discover that the organic waste (ie. food) bin is also full (they take rubbish separation reeally seriously here!) Decide I can’t be bothered to go all the way back downstairs right now. Return to the internet and write this blog post.

– And now that the blog post is written I shall make a start on the floor. If I sweep all the crumbs into little piles now I might even manage to get the dustpan and brush out to remove the piles before I go out for lunch later… Wish me luck people!

How do they do it?

Do you know there are people out there who actually manage to work full time, bring up kids and keep their houses (relatively) tidy. I’m not sure whether I should admire them are track them down and shoot them in a jealous rage. I can barely cope with dragging myself out of bed early enough to have a shower before work never mind anything else (and I certainly don’t have time to shave the forest that’s where my legs should be). And I’m possibly the world’s worst housewife – which may actually be part of the reason I have neither a house nor a husband. Hmm, I think I shall have to ask the boyfriend. “If I improve my housekeeping skills do you think you might consider moving in with me one day?”. Have a feeling that one may go down like a lead balloon.

So it seems like I’m even more ridiculously useless than usual lately.  Although I did actually manage to remember to go to the post office, which is good. Another 2 days and they would have taken my package back to where it came from. And I’ve washed most of the dishes now (notice how I have to qualify that one with a most – I’m not that good). On the other hand, I never did get round to taking my clothes out of the wardrobe for a moth inspection. And I totally forgot to post a letter to a friend again. It’s been sitting there for over a week just waiting to be stamped and put in the post box. It’s not even like I have to go and buy stamps – I have stamps in my purse. It’s just the taking one out and sticking it on the envelope part that appears to be beyond me. Also I desperately need to do some washing before I completely run out of stuff to wear for work ( how I long for the day when I have a washing machine!). Oh, and I completely forgot that my tram ticket run out today so I have no idea what I’m going to do about getting to work tomorrow. Take the old one and pray nobody checks or hope I have enough money on me for two one way tickets? Decisions, decisions…

How many days is it til the weekend?

August. Blink too often and you’ll miss it.

I have nothing to say at the moment, but I feel like now I’ve started this blog I must write something every single day. No idea why – perhaps I’m afraid an evil creature will come and get me if I don’t.

Oooh, speaking of evil creatures… I have been saved from the scary, scary moths. On Friday eveing I saw another of the creepy little bugs in my cupboard. It was just sitting there on the top shelf trying to look all innocent.. then it flew out and touched me!! Scream? I did! Jan, who was watching TV at the time, called me pathetic then told me to just go away, he would deal with it. So I did. And he did. He took everything off the top shelf of the cupboard, threw away some pudding rice and a tub of vanilla cappucinio (apparantly there were moths sitting on the cappucino. On the lid that is. No idea why – it’s not like there was any way for them to get to the powder inside). Then he washed out the cupboard, put my remaining food back in and since then I’ve been moth free. A whole 3 days now. Woo hoo!

Time is zooming away from me again. Already August is more than half over. Actually, it’s kind of a good thing that August is more than half over… I’m getting very low on money and need it to hurry up and be the end of the month… pay day! But still… how is this already the third week of my new internship? My last place of work is starting to seem almost like a distant memory. No wonder I never manage to get everything done… it seems like every time I blink I open my eyes to find that an hour’s passed.

See… it just did it again. It’s 7:45pm now and I haven’t done a single useful thing this evening! How do other people manage to hold down full time jobs and keep on top of all their housework and bring up children, all at the same time? With only one small room to keep tidy and no children to worry about I can’t even manage to keep on top of my laundry! Just more evidence that I’d be the world’s worst housewife I guess…